Wednesday, September 02, 2009

i was summer (only less attractive)

I went and saw a movie tonight. My mom and I are frequent patrons of the late night movie, and it is one of my favorite things to do. Put kids to bed and meet and the theater. I almost always leave satisfied with our choice of movie. Last week it was "Julie and Julia." Loved. Tonight we saw "(500) Days of Summer." Pretty much everyone I've talked to has raved about it and promised a delightful story with good acting and compelling music. 

Why did I leave the theater tonight feeling sad? (If you haven't seen the movie and plan to, stop reading because I'm about to talk about the ending.)

I can't shake the melancholy off, and I am worried that I know why. It's because I was Summer, isn't it? I was the girl who had someone's heart and I broke it. I wasn't dishonest (quite the opposite-- we both knew what we were signing up for), but neither was Summer. Tom knew that she didn't want anything serious all along. I wasn't mean or intentionally hurtful. Neither was Summer. But oh! The pain that she caused! Tonight the pain that I must've caused is feeling more acute, perhaps it has been ripened with time and a more mature heart. Of course in the end we all have ended up with who we were meant to be with. She is so much better with him than I would have been, and I have no doubt that my husband is my perfect match. Why do I feel so bad then? I hate knowing that I hurt someone, even though I know he is grateful and happy (now) that I did. Is that weird? Is this familiar to anyone else, or am I a little crazy? Maybe I have some apologies left to say? Not sure.

7 comments:

Lemme said...

i saw that movie a couple weeks ago...i loved it!! im not sure i've ever broken a heart as much as summer did to tom though.


and you are way more attractive than summer!!!!!

Court-Court said...

I did the same thing just a couple of months ago... So when I saw it I left depressed for days. I felt so sad for him and finally realized what I did. I can definitely relate!!

Danica Osborn said...

so i was a teensy bit sad too after the movie. i really liked it, but you do feel bad for the guy and the real side of love that it portrays makes it a little bit sad.

i'm apparently too shallow to have made the connection to my own life, but i too was definitely a "summer" a few times. and now you've got me wondering why the guilt still catches up with us some times even though we're blissfully married now, and so are these guys...hmmm...

Bryan and Christy Clark said...

i definitely related. I still feel terrible about the boy I "dear john-ed". I absolutely dont feel bad that I did it...just that I hurt someone. So, when you figure out how to come to terms with that and not feel bad...let me know!!!

Anonymous said...

YOU KEEP EPIC SECRETS FROM YOUR FAMILY.

Sassy Rachel said...

So I'm totally loving the colon. It's so cute liz. Funny. Oh Liz, how I forget spending the night with you and doing crazy things. Jon is so lucky:) That pic of you hunched over brings back crazy fun memories, and doensn't startle me at all...what does that say?:)

I love the fishing pics of j and baby g...so presh. So when is number 2 on it's way? Did the romantic weekend help little Sally finally get to come into this world? Oh I hope so:)

Mandy and Roger Woodhouse said...

Loved the movie.... you are FUNNY.